Florida Catholic | Catholic cemeteries: a link from heaven

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Catholic cemeteries: a link from heaven

JANET SHELTON | FLORIDA CATHOLIC ST. PETERSBURG BUREAU EDITOR

Published: 08.29.08

Bishop Robert N. Lynch, third from left, and other priests of the Diocese of St. Petersburg, process toward the altar at Calvary Catholic Cemetery during the Memorial Day Mass in 2007.

ED FOSTER JR. | FC
Bishop Robert N. Lynch, third from left, and other priests of the Diocese of St. Petersburg, process toward the altar at Calvary Catholic Cemetery during the Memorial Day Mass in 2007.

ST. PETERSBURG | Norman Pilarski could have been buried in any one of nine cemeteries near his Largo home. After his funeral Mass at St. Matthew Parish, however, his wife, children and grandchildren took him to Calvary Catholic Cemetery in Clearwater.

“To me, it’s sacred ground,” his wife, Carol, said. “I felt that because of my Catholic faith, that was where I wanted him to be.”

A century ago, Catholic cemeteries were almost always part of parishes. Today’s Catholics who want to wait for Christ’s coming on consecrated ground most often choose burial in a diocese-run Catholic cemetery.

“There are only two places that are consecrated … a church and a cemetery,” said Msgr. Norman Balthazar, the diocesan director of Catholic cemeteries. “They have a very special blessing of consecration.”

Msgr. Norman Balthazar, left, and Bishop Robert N. Lynch recess from the altar at Calvary Catholic Cemetery after Mass on All Souls Day in 2007.

ED FOSTER JR. | FC
Msgr. Norman Balthazar, left, and Bishop Robert N. Lynch recess from the altar at Calvary Catholic Cemetery after Mass on All Souls Day in 2007.

Catholic dioceses operate hundreds of cemeteries in the United States. Most are in heavily populated areas.

“It’s a ministry,” said Mark Lazaroski, president of the Catholic Cemetery Conference, a national organization based in Illinois with more than 900 member cemeteries. “The focus of the Catholic cemetery is to bring in our faith ... in any way we can.”

What do Catholic cemeteries provide? Ideally, a link from heaven, to birth, to death, to the future.

“Catholic cemeteries are ministers of grief,” said Carol Giambalto, who serves on the Catholic Cemetery Conference board. “We work with families not just at the deep-grief level at the point of death, … we also work with families later, when grief shows itself more pointedly.

“Grief never goes away,” she said. “It just changes.”

Msgr. Balthazar personally experienced the importance of his work with grieving families when his mother died a few months ago.

“Most of my grieving was done after I did the duties,” the priest said. “It’s very emotional. On one sense, you can be so brainy about everything, but on the other side of the question are all the things that can’t be measured – all the absence, all the loss. … Here I am driving someplace and I’m crying. … A thought comes up from nowhere.”

This statue of Jesus and children is the focal point of one of two areas at Calvary Catholic Cemetery that are reserved for interment of children.

ED FOSTER JR. | FC
This statue of Jesus and children is the focal point of one of two areas at Calvary Catholic Cemetery that are reserved for interment of children.

Catholic cemeteries look Catholic. Shrines and statuary depict Mary, the saints and angels. Every building carries a visual reminder of the Catholic faith. They are places of Catholic celebration. Twice a year, Bishop Robert N. Lynch and his priests celebrate an outdoor Mass at Calvary for the souls of those buried there and their families.

“I want (people) to feel they are entering into a park where there is a certain amount of serenity,” said Msgr. Balthazar. “I want to give them the sense that if they go there they can have serenity, they can have peace, and they can communicate with their loved ones and not be distracted.

“Most of all,” he said. “I want them to feel that their loves one are cared for. The one thing you never want to see is your loved ones neglected.”

Catholic cemeteries face challenges.

At one time, burial in the sites was a given and Catholics knew where they were located through church bulletins. Lazaroski says Catholics don’t go to Mass as regularly as they once did, so he also advertises in the secular press and on billboards.

Finding a balance between faith and finance also isn’t easy, he said. The not-for-profit cemeteries have to be maintained into the deep future and that requires careful business planning. But they also are a church charity and bound by faith to help those who cannot afford their services.

“The greatest challenge is communication to Catholics about why burial of their loved one is important,” Giambalto said. “(We want them to understand) that the person they loved is now deceased, but the body still deserves respect because of the baptism of the Holy Sprit and the person this body once held.”

Not everyone buried in Catholic cemeteries is Catholic. Msgr. Balthazar said members of Jewish, Bahá’í and non-Catholic Christian faiths are buried at Calvary.

Calvary is the only Catholic cemetery staffed and open to the public in the St. Petersburg Diocese, the priest said. That will soon change. The diocese has purchased a tract of land near Race Track Road and Gunn Highway in Odessa for Holy Cross Catholic Cemetery, which is expected to open in a year to a year and a half.

That’s good news for people like Carol Pilarski. Her husband worked at Calvary before he died, and she believes to her core that there is no better resting place for the man she loved.

I’m not sure some of the other cemeteries have the same attitude, goals and mission of the Catholic cemetery,” she said. “Somehow, you can lose that sense of spirituality.”

“People can see we’re different,” Lazaroski said. “We’re not just a burial ground. We’re here till resurrection.”

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