Florida Catholic | Seminarian Tom Lafreniere

40-year-old seminarian stops saying 'not yet' to God

PAT LANGFORD | FLORIDA CATHOLIC CORRESPONDENT

Published: 10.12.07

Seminarian Tom Lafreniere, right, attends Mass at St. Vincent de Paul Regional Seminary with his mother, Gloria, and father, Al, who were visiting from Connecticut for a family event.
LINDA REEVES | FC

BOYNTON BEACH — Tom Lafreniere heard God calling him to the priesthood and for years answered the same way: not yet.

His response changed when he hit his mid-30s. He entered the St. Vincent de Paul Regional Seminary in the fall of 2003.

"I thought I was too old. I realized there are men older than myself in the seminary. I said, 'Why not?' A lot of us older guys bring skills that some people may not have," said Lafreniere, now 40 and one of 16 seminarians studying at various levels and institutions to become priests of the Diocese of Palm Beach.

The Florida Catholic interviewed Lafreniere and people who have watched his vocation unfold in anticipation of Vocation Awareness Sunday, Oct. 14.

"My goal right now is to get to my ordination as a priest," said Lafreniere, who is scheduled to be ordained as a transitional deacon in April 2008 at St. Ann Parish in West Palm Beach, where he served a year as part of seminarian responsibilities. Usually, priestly ordination comes about one year later.

According to seminary professors, Lafreniere is an excellent student and a good priest candidate.

"Tom has amazed me with the excellent grasp of what I have taught him, at times really leaving me speechless after reading one of his final exams," said professor Emilio Chavez. "He also has a remarkable capacity for work. Besides this, he is quiet, circumspect and prudent."

Several experiences led Lafreniere to consider the priesthood.

"My father had a close relationship with several men who had answered a religious vocation," he said about his father, Al, a resident of Connecticut with the seminarian's mother, Gloria.

"I believe that the presence of these men and the openness with which my parents accepted them, made it easy for me to accept a religious vocation as a viable option. Also, I remember feeling something special about participating in the Mass as an altar boy. Even in my childhood, I understood that something special was taking place."

Lafreniere, who attended Xavier High School in Middletown, Conn., run by the Xaverian brothers, said his home was always a place of prayer.

"We always said a prayer of thanksgiving before meals, and when my brothers — I have two — and I were growing up, we would also have family prayer. Really, all of these factors contributed to my openness to the priesthood."

Lafreniere said the call for him came when he was about 16, during a charismatic conference he attended with his family.

"I spent some time in prayer after this conference and realized that I was not ready at that time," he said.

After a move to Boca Raton, a corporate career and job as a company trainer, the call to religious life came again but a little louder.

"After nearly 20 years, I finally felt as if I was ready to accept God's call to become a priest. As I began to consider the priesthood more seriously, God confirmed my feelings through words of several priests, both here and in Connecticut," Lafreniere said. "After speaking with the vocations director, I began a period of prayer and discernment that led to my entrance into St. Vincent de Paul Seminary."

Lafreniere's home parish is St. Joan of Arc Parish. His service work includes prison ministry. While at St. Ann, service included helping at St. Ann Place, an outreach to the homeless and poor.

"He's a promising young man," said St. Ann Place's Sister Carleen Cekal of the School Sisters of Notre Dame community. "Just … delightful. You name it, he did it. When you needed help, he was there. I think he's going to make an excellent priest."

At this point, the seminarian has a hectic schedule and lives in a dorm on campus. A typical day includes prayer before classes, Mass and about six hours of instruction. The seminarians also meet and greet visitors to the campus.

"While guests are always welcome, we especially invite guests to our (12:15 p.m.) Mass on Wednesdays, where we pray for vocations," Lafreniere said. The weekly Mass is open to the public and followed by lunch.

Larry Winker, president of the Serra Club of South Palm Beach County, an organization with a stated goal of increasing vocations, often visits the seminary.

"It's nice to share in an experience like this," Winker said. "It's always a beautiful Mass."

Lafreniere says after classes, there are service and church projects and plenty of study, reading, research and papers to complete for theology, Scripture and pastoral studies.

Students are involved in sports and other outdoor activities. The weekends are free for relaxing, travel, movies and music.

"When I have a chance to read for pleasure, I read crime stories, classics or poetry," said Lafreniere. "In fact, I have been known to try my hand at writing some poetry every now and again, as well."

Upon completion of studies, students earn a master's of divinity. Lafreniere said that while the seminary is all about full-time studies and learning, the environment offers something else.

"Because of our focus on becoming priests, which is more than a job, a vocation or way of life, seminary life involves more aspects of our lives. One of the great things about seminary life is the brotherhood that develops between the seminarians. I have developed some friendships that I believe will last the rest of my life," he said.

After four years on the path to priesthood, Lafreniere has good advice to share with men who may be considering religious life.

"My first suggestion to someone thinking about becoming a priest is to pray. Remember that it is God who calls us to our vocation in life. If God is calling you to the priesthood, talk to him about it. After you've spent some time in prayer, talk to a priest," he said.

Lafreniere's mom is confident that her son will make an excellent priest.

"I am excited that he has chosen this path," she said. "He has never been this happy."

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40-year-old seminarian stops saying 'not yet' to God

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